My Career Advice for Madonna

Not that she asked for it, but here’s my career advice for Madonna, my fellow 60-something Baby Boomer with whom I share an interest in provocative self-expression.

Madonna’s been in the news lately with her album Madame X, along with her complaints about a New York Times Magazine article, “Madonna at Sixty” by Vanessa Grigoriadis, that she considered unfair and sexist. Her Instagram post about the article ended with this ringing battle cry:

Further proof that the venerable N.Y.T. Is one of the founding fathers of the Patriarchy. And I say—DEATH TO THE PATRIARCHY woven deep into the fabric of Society. I will never stop fighting to eradicate it.

(Does Madonna read the Times, which fights the patriarchy with every comma and period?)

Well, there’s no such thing as bad publicity, unless your name is Jeffrey Epstein. Still, as Madonna finds ways to stay in the public eye, I suggest she could ramp up the rage by going back to the future—by creating a sequel to her smash 1986 song and video, “Papa Don’t Preach.” Given the unending national conversation about abortion, this idea could poke a lot of exposed nerves.

Set in blue-collar Staten Island with the World Trade Center poignantly seen in the background, the video shows Madonna learning she’s pregnant, dancing with her boyfriend on the Staten Island Ferry, and struggling to tell her father, Danny Aiello, about her decision. How will old-school single dad Aiello react? His responds, after some reflection, with a hug to the news that “I’m keeping my baby.”

The video kicked up huge controversy when it debuted. Observers interpreted it as blows against the patriarchy and the Catholic Church, or for the glamor of teen pregnancy, or for women’s empowerment and against abortion. Madonna pulled off the trick of loading enough ambiguity into “Papa Don’t Preach” to enable multiple interpretations.

As in:

Feminist lawyer Gloria Allred, the spokeswoman of the National Organization for Women (NOW), angrily called for Madonna to make a public statement or another record supporting the opposite point of view.

But Tipper Gore liked the video!

So go know. 

All I can say is the song and the crisp storytelling of the video make it one of my favorite performances from the 1980s, a video I can watch repeatedly. Lyrics have a stark moral sense that could come from the songs of Tammy Wynette and Merle Haggard, like “You always taught me right from wrong” and

He says that he's going to marry me
We can raise a little family
Maybe we'll be all right
It's a sacrifice

A sequel to “Papa Don’t Preach” would put Madonna right back in the public conversation in a way that a Times Magazine cover article can’t. Danny Aiello is still hale and hearty at 86 so he could make a return appearance as the papa not preaching. Staten Island hasn’t floated out to sea, the ferry still runs. All the pieces are in place.

I could see a sequel starring Madonna as the older version of the gamine beauty in the “Italians do it better” t-shirt from 1986, now dealing with her own daughter (played by Lady Gaga?) or granddaughter (Miley Cyrus?) on an unexpected pregnancy. They could fight the patriarchy in matching pink pussycat hats at the January 2017 women’s march. Maybe they could be mother-daughter gestational carriers for people taking nontraditional paths to parenthood. Or the action could be along the lines of  a “mama don’t preach” generational clash. Or mother and daughter could escort women from Mississippi to an abortion clinic. Or they could echo Cory Booker and escort pregnant women over the Rio Grande from Mexico. Or they could be on opposite sides of a picket line at an abortion clinic or a showing of the movie Unplanned. The scenarios are endless, although the room for ambiguity and nuanced messaging is narrower than in 1986.

Or perhaps Madonna could express all these ideas in an extended mini-movie on the fateful decisions involving sexuality and pregnancy—pushing the intimate timeline back further to the choices people make in relationships. She need not stay with one party line. The specifics don’t matter so long as she circles back to the iconic video and stirs up discussion, with Twitterers and talk show hosts screaming, “How could she . . . !” and calling her a despicable gender traitor (which sounds better in German) or a baby killer.

When that happens and she still looks stylish, Madonna’s done her job.